December 26, 2003 - Anti-Racial-Profiling Questionnairre

You've probably seen the racial profiling questionnaire that has been circulating the Internet since 9/11. Some of us heard the clamor for "revenge" and saw the rounding-up and persecutions of Arabs and Muslims, and were instantly afraid of the path our country might be headed down. Like historical American persecutions of Chinese-Americans, German-Americans, blacks, women, Japanese-Americans, and homosexuals, we saw the potential threat to our freedom in calls for racial profiling at airports, and injustice at Guantanamo Bay.

In reaction to liberal concern over mistreatment of Arabs and Muslims, the original questionnaire made the rounds to support racial profiling. If you've missed it, you can find the original on hundreds of sites with great names like patriotvocals.com, greatspiritualbattle.com, freerepublic.com, and restoringamerica.org, along with tons of blogs, who love this type of stuff.

I've finally decided to create a response to the original racist questionnairre, and I wonder if the people who support racial profiling will suddenly decide we should profile THEM, too.

Please pause a moment, reflect back, and take the following multiple choice test concerning historical events.

1. In the early 1970's, Santa Cruz, California earned the nickname "Murder Capital of the World" after at least 23 murders by:
a. Cassius Clay
b. Salma Hayek
c. Hakim Olajuwon
d. White, male, American citizens between the ages of 17 and 40

2. During the 1970s, the bodies of more than thirty men and boys who were viciously tortured, raped and murdered were found in the crawlspace of:
a. Shabbetai Tzevi
b. Larry Johnson
c. Mohamed and Ahmed Ibrahim
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

3. Airplanes and universities were bombed during the 70s, 80s, and 90s by:
a. Aladdin
b. Satyajit Ray
c. F. Murray Abraham
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

4. Throughout the 1980s, at least 48 women were killed in the Green River area of Washington and Oregon by:
a. Cat Stevens
b. Kareem Abdul-Jabar
c. Omar Sharif
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

5. In 1984, 21 people were killed and 19 more people were injured after a shooting in a McDonalds by:
a. Casey Kasem
b. Fareed Zakharia
c. Zohair Hamdan
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

6. In 1987, American Airlines flight 1771 was destroyed after the pilots were shot by:
a. Mahmood Abdul-Rauf
b. Hasim Rahman
c. Ali Baba
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40 (and an airline pilot with proper identification, btw)

7. During the 80s and 90s, up to 60 patients were killed by a single doctor:
a. Tony Shalhoub
b. Yasmine Bleeth
c. Salman Rushdie
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

8. In 1993, more than 80 people were killed, including 17 children and 4 FBI agents, after the 51-day siege of a compound led by:
a. Ahmad Chalabi
b. Art Blakey
c. The Yemeni Chanters Troupe
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

9. In 1995, 168 people were killed and more than 500 were injured in the bombing of a Federal building in Oklahoma City by:
a. Ahmad Rashad
b. Doug Flutie
c. Gabriel Yared
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

10. In 1998, James Byrd, Jr. was dragged behind a truck until his head and arm were torn off and his face was unrecognizable by:
a. Tony Ismail
b. Jamie Farr
c. Ralph Nader
d. White, male, American citizens between the ages of 17 and 40

11. In 1999, the 2nd-biggest school massacre in American history was carried out by:
a. Mohammad and Andre Agassi
b. Edward Said
c. Danny, Tony, and Marlo Thomas
d. White, male, American citizens between the ages of 17 and 40

12. In 1999, a shooting spree across Illinois ended with the suicide of:
a. Shannon Elizabeth
b. T.E. Lawrence
c. Najeeb Halaby and Queen Noor
d. A white, male, American citizen between the age of 17 and 40

So you see, it should be just as easy to justify profiling of white, male, American citizens... but of course we wouldn't do that, because that would be US! The only people we can justify persecuting is THEM; The people who don't have any power to fight back.

P.S. For those who are wondering, the "false options" listed in this questionnairre are all made up of famous or notable Muslims, Arab-Americans, Middle-Easterners, and a few others who might be caught in any such racial profiling. They include actors, athletes, Nobel Prize winners, politicians, movement leaders, musicians, authors, 2 characters from the 1001 Arabian Nights, and the 2-year-old conjoined Egyptian twins who were successfully separated in October.